I’m a big fan of the xXx (Triple X) franchise, my favorite being the third film, Return of Xander Cage, which I find quite dope! Perfect mix of a cool storyline, peng and diverse cast, action, cool themes, suspense and all that good stuff.
Apart from the kick-assry, sharp thinking and planning, intriguing twists, heroism, power moves
and Vin Diesel’s muscles, I’m also particularly impressed by the reluctant friendship that developed among the protagonists and how they pooled in their varying strengths to work as a team even though they were on seemingly opposite sides initially and had gotten off on the wrong foot.
Just watching the movie reminded me of my own reluctant friendships. I use the term “reluctant” because I wouldn’t have thought or imagined I could be friends with some people considering my initial experiences with, and first impressions of them. So eventually becoming friends was sort of a gradual and reluctant though well worth it process.
Case in point: I have this coursemate and friend that I didn’t like initially. Judging from the fact that she barely interacted with most people in class then, I decided she was snobbish, snooty and stuck up. She always moved with just a particular group of girls and even though we lived in the same hostel, we barely talked. This continued even till our second year.
Things changed when we both became executives in our departmental association and had to work together a lot. Of course, we had arguments and slight mutual dislike but I also noticed her brilliant work ethic and get-it-done spirit which earned my grudging respect and gradually, we went on to become friends.
Then I learned that those times I thought she was being stuck up and aloof, she was just quite shy and unsure in a new environment and it takes a while for her to warm up to new people. Those friends she always moved with were those she’d known from secondary school so she felt more in tune and comfortable with them.
Fast forward to now, we’ve gotten quite close and have gone on to share lots of goofy, crazy and serious moments, eat, play basketball, read, gist and hangout together. Funny enough, I later got to know that she didn’t like me at first too because she thought I was a spoilt rich girl (omo-butter), too conservative and a tad bit stuck up too. Lol, this life ehn!
The day my other friends and I swapped stories about our first impressions of one another and how we became friends, I mentally shook my head. Who knew that things would be this way? So much for first impressions and appearances. I mean, I’ve learnt and gained so much from people that didn’t look like they could add to me. Even became very close to those we used to argue and beef one another a lot, lol. Thankfully, letting go of some things has make way for good and value-adding relationships.
Most people probably have one or two friends like this, those we didn’t imagine we could even talk to ever again, let alone become friends. Background differences, preconceived notions, stereotypes, personal prejudices and initial experiences might make us draw conclusions about certain people and keep them at arm’s length. However, if we look beyond all these and keep an open mind (without compromising our standards though), we can find valuable and helpful friendships in them, howbeit reluctantly.
Do you have a similar story? I would love to know about your reluctant friendships too: your first experience, how you became friends and your friendship experience so far. Go ahead and share below!
– The Value Adder™